RolePlay Tips

Admin · Administrator Joined: 13 Aug 2014 Posts: 14

Isn't it annoying to have an action scene in mind - explosive and exciting - but be unable to write it without ruining the mood? I know it was for me.
So here is a list of tips:

Use verbs with impact.

There are many verbs that can describe actions, but not all of them keep up the pace or the adrenaline. By verbs with impact I mean verbs that give you the feeling of action, resonant, strong verbs. A few examples: to crash, to crush something, to rush, to smash, to strike, to storm, to flash (as appearing suddenly or out of nowhere), to tear, to burst into, to bust, to shatter, to snatch, to slam, to shout, to bump, to slash, to collapse (a building, for example). To run is also an option at hand, but so common that it kinda lost effect.

- Don't be afraid to use the word 'adrenaline'.

That's what an action scene is about, right? The characters feel adrenaline regardless the situation. Don't use it excessively, though.

- Short and concise sentences.

Remember you have to keep up the pace and the feeling. If you use long and too describing phrases, your partner will lose track of the action. Don't add long description of the surroundings or of a character's look (hair colour, eyes colour, what they wear, stuffs like that). You may say things about the surroundings, but briefly. And only if it's relevant for the scene.

- Gestures

A character's gestures can help a lot with the scene. It's pretty boring to just read what's going on, but don't know what the character's physical reaction is. Still, don't get into too many details.

- Emotions

I could say the same thing as for the gestures. Describe the feelings webbing in the character's mind and soul, but briefly.

- Interjections

Words like Boom! , Thud! and such can be useful to mark the impacts, but don't overuse them. Once in a few paragraphs is more than enough.

Admin · Administrator Joined: 13 Aug 2014 Posts: 14

Verbs with impact - classified

Remember that this list does not contain all the verbs with impact.

1. Appear

Flash
Bloom
Spawn
Arise
Burst in (e.g in the room)
Barge in
Pop out

2. Attack & Fight

Attack
Assault
Strike
Ambush
Rush
Storm
Charge
Bombard
Shoot
Hit
Smack
Slap
Slash
Slam
Punch
Bump / Bump into
Swing (e.g. a sword)
Knock
Kick
Ram
Invade
Dodge
Wrestle
Launch
Clash
Struggle
Smuggle (because that can be part of the fight too)
etc
Actually, most verbs expressing attacks are verbs with impact because... well, the attack itself is something with impact.

3. Break

Crush
Crack
Smash
Shatter
Tear
Snap
Rip (not 'reap' and not 'rape')
Burst
Explode
Bust
Crumble
Break

4. Bring & Take

Fetch
Grab
Snatch
Steal
Grip
Snap up
Wrench

5. Voice

Shout
Cry
Yell
Scream
Hail
Roar
Howl
Growl
Yelp
Whimper
Shriek
Snarl
Cheer

6. Chase

Chase
Hunt
Track

7. Close

Shut
Slam (e.g the door shut)

8. Fall

Tumble
Collapse
Crash
Crumple
Dive
Stumble
Sink
Slump
Trip

9. Hold

Grasp
Grip
Clench
Clutch
Squeeze

10. Hurry & Run & Jump

Speed
Rush
Run
Sprint
Hustle
Dash
Slide
Race
Jog
Streak
Bounce
Spring
Hop
Pounce
Lurch
Skip

11. Look

Gawk
Take a glimpse
Glare
Peek
Glance

12. Push

Shove
Knock
Thrust
Jam
Squish
Force
Crush

13. Shake

Shiver
Quiver
Quake
Tremble
Vibrate
Jolt
Shudder
Thrash
Jerk
Twitch
Spasm
Throb
Ripple

14. Throw

Throw
Toss
Hurl
Flip
Launch
Fire
Discharge (rarely used unless being spoken about a gun)

15. Turn

Twist
Swing
Swirl
Sway
Whirl

Wow! This list came out as longer than I expected. And when you think there are many more words you could use... :sly:

Admin · Administrator Joined: 13 Aug 2014 Posts: 14

Example 1: Collin & Sean [fragment]

This is a short extract of Simone&Chris' RP, which I think it's qualified enough to be an example. I also chose them because I think they make a great pair, they mix perfectly and complete each other. Roleplay related, of course.

Yes, I do have their permissions to post it here.

Guests:

Simone Parkinson

Sean Cole

Sean Cole (FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/sean.cole.77 ):

[...] Sean brought his hand to his face, groaning in frustration. He moved only an inch but that was enough to avoid the danger. In the blink of an eye, something shattered the back window, a hundred pieces of glass crashing on their clothes, hair and skin, hopefully not leaving any cuts behind. Not like any of them had the time to feel any pain. Blood was splashed on the front seat and for a brief moment Sean wondered who the injured one was. His eyes shot to Collin for he himself couldn't feel any ache, only the adrenaline rushing through his veins, ready to take control over his body. Then the car started drifting and a sound of something collapsing echoed like a thunder. "Fuck!" In an instant, Sean reached for the wheel, leaning over the driver's numb corpse. He quickly forced it to the side, barely avoiding smashing against the wall.

"Can you drive?" He shouted at Collin, his hand instantly reaching for the gun. Bent like this, he couldn't drive and shoot properly, both at the same time.

Simone Parkinson (FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100005792776169&fref=tl_fr_box&pnref=lhc.friends ):

Collin would have glared daggers at the brunet, if he hadn't been busy trying not to have a panic attack. His first time in London, his arse. However, this was not the proper time to yell at the stinky American. They were currently in a cab, currently being followed by God knows whose bloody tracker and Collin could see this story slowly making its way to the front page of the Daily Mail. He almost swore when he saw the cabbie slowing down- was he daft?- and silently prayed that the tracker didn't realised they phones about him.

No such luck. Pieces of glass ricocheted and sank into his neck and right arm, the shock of the impact forcing the younger male to bend down and bring his hands to his now buzzing ears. Luckily, they were small- yet Collin could feel tiny several stings pulsing painfully in his flesh. The brief ache was however forgotten when a wave of surging adrenaline hit his system, setting his nerves on fire. Somehow, he heard Sean yelling at him something about driving. He slowly rose his head up and promptly turned a few shades whiter than his normal pale complexion.

The cabbie was dead; Sean was bending over him, trying to shoot back while holding the steering wheel like the bloody American he was.

Collin actually swore this time.

'Yes, I do!' He yelled back. [...]

Analysis

Did you feel like you were there? Could you picture the scene? I know I did !

- Verbs with impact: to shatter, to crash, to splash, to shoot, to rush, to drift, to collapse, to force, to smash, to shout, to glare, to yell, to ricochet, to sink, to pulse, to hit. There are also resonant words (e.g thunder).

- Adrenaline: it was used, but more importantly, it was described.

- Concise. Do you think they drifted from the action? Did you loose track of what was going on? I'm sure the answers are both negative. Did they keep up the pace? Yeah, I guess they did.

- Gestures: just enough to know how they react.

- Emotions: it's easy to notice Sean's mix of adrenaline and calm, but also Collin's shock and panic (and some resentment too).